Couples therapy to rebuild trust, resolve conflicts, and strengthen your relationship.
Marriage counseling, also called couples therapy, is a type of psychotherapy. Marriage counseling helps couples recognize and resolve conflicts and improve their relationships. Through marriage counseling, you can make thoughtful decisions about rebuilding and strengthening your relationship or going your separate ways.
Marriage counseling is often short term. Marriage counseling typically includes both partners, but sometimes one partner chooses to work with a therapist alone. The specific treatment plan depends on the situation.
Some couples seek marriage counseling to strengthen their partnership and gain a better understanding of each other. Marriage counseling can also help couples who plan to get married. Premarital counseling can help couples achieve a deeper understanding of each other and iron out differences before marriage.
In other cases, couples seek marriage counseling to improve a troubled relationship. You can use marriage counseling to help with many specific issues, including:
Marriage counseling might also be helpful in cases of domestic abuse. If violence has escalated to the point that you're afraid, however, counseling alone isn't adequate. Contact the police or crisis center for emergency support.
Marriage counseling typically brings couples or partners together for joint therapy sessions. Working with a therapist, you'll learn skills to solidify your relationship, such as:
You'll talk about the good and bad parts of your relationship as you pinpoint and better understand the sources of your conflicts. Together you'll learn how to identify problems without blame and instead examine how things can be improved.
It might be hard to talk about your problems with the counselor. Sessions might pass in silence as you and your partner remain angry over perceived wrongs — or you might yell or argue during sessions. Both are OK. Your therapist can act as a referee and help you cope with the resulting emotions.
You can go by yourself. If your partner refuses to attend marriage counseling sessions, you can still attend. It's more challenging to mend a relationship this way, but you can benefit by learning more about your reactions and behavior.
Some people need only a few sessions, while others need several months. The specific treatment plan will depend on your situation. Sometimes, marriage counseling helps couples discover that their differences truly are irreconcilable and that it's best to end the relationship. Sessions can then focus on skills for ending the relationship on good terms.
You might have homework. Your counselor might suggest communication exercises at home to help you practice what you've learned. For example, talk face-to-face with your partner for a few minutes every day about non-stressful things — without interruptions from TVs, phones, or children.
You or your partner might need additional care. If one of you is coping with mental illness, substance abuse, or other issues, your therapist might work with other health care providers to provide more complete treatment.
Making the decision to go to marriage counseling can be tough. If you have a troubled relationship, however, seeking help is more effective than ignoring your problems or hoping they get better on their own. Most individuals find the experience to be insightful and empowering.